As an adult, how many times have you given advice or guidance to children? I would assume your wisdom shared with others has been gained through your life experiences. Your life has already led you down the road which a young person has not yet traveled. Your instruction to them is passionate and confident. You have the advantage of a clear vision for things they cannot see.
Being a mother of two, I have given a multitude of life instructions over the years. However, what I have learned is that often, what I thought were lessons my children needed, God actually intended for me. On numerous occasions, as soon as the words left my mouth as an instruction to my children, I would experience a light bulb moment. This moment would reveal God’s perfect love and instructions for me.
My daughter, as a child, was a bit of a free spirit. Wonder where she got it from??? Very strong-willed and determined to do what she wanted to do when she wanted to do it!
I very distinctly remember a time when she was about three years old. She took off running through a parking lot. Of course, I screamed at her to come back immediately and hold my hand. In an effort to explain in a way a three-year-old would understand, I said, “Mommy can’t protect you if you don’t hold my hand. The parking lot is a dangerous location for a small child. But, if you hold my hand and stay right by my side, I can keep you safe”. At that very moment, it was as if God threw a ton of bricks on my head. He literally spoke to me, saying, “Yes, Torri… that is exactly what I have been trying to tell YOU. Hold my hand so I can protect you”.
I am going through a season where I am looking at change. Though change can serve a great purpose in life, it can be scary as hell. I have been keeping myself in constant anxiety with my thoughts. But guess what? I have been running through the parking lot on my own, not holding God’s hand. Of course, when we go at it alone, there is going to be fear and danger.
By holding God’s hand, you are walking beside the Creator of ALL things, the master orchestrator of the Universe. I must remember to trust in Him as I asked my children many times to trust in me. Any advice we give a young person is delivered with confidence and truth. Our words of wisdom are deeply rooted in our own life lessons, which have left us with a clear vision.
My friends, if we developed such deep wisdom from past experiences, God knows so much more than we do as to what lies ahead. Why wouldn’t I hold his hand?
Early in my daughter’s teenage years, she developed severe anxiety and depression. During this time as a parent, I invested countless hours in prayer and counseling. And need I dare mention the multitude of encouraging speeches I delivered to her every day throughout the day!
One particular night stands out above the rest. It was a night that she was feeling particularly low. Exhausted from the continuous battle against anxiety and depression, she was ready to give up. My beautiful daughter that I hold so close to me, struggled to find an ounce of joy in life. Embraced in each other’s arms, her hopeless words poured cold through my veins like ice. She described it to be a dark, scary place where there was no light, no motivation to keep waking up battling the same feelings over and over again.
Please let me stress the importance of seeking professional help if someone you know is struggling with suicide: Suicide Prevention Hotline.
I held her close and prayed. Pulling deep from within every experience I had ever survived, I offered her with great confidence the following:
“My precious one, remember how dark and scary it is as you walk through a haunted house? The darkness does not allow you to know what lies ahead. You know there are surprises deeply hidden, waiting to jump out and scare you. Though you cannot see them, you know they are there. The anxiety from the unknown hiding in the darkness causes your heart to pound in your throat. Yet through all of the fear and darkness, you keep moving forward. You hear the guide’s voice ahead, leading the group through the darkness. At that moment, do you not put your trust in the guide? You hold onto the person in front of you, and you keep moving forward. Baby girl, let me be your guide. Trust me. I know you can’t see right now, and you are scared. I can see! Don’t worry; I know the way! Listen to my voice, hold onto me tightly, and let me be your guide through the darkness.”
“Seriously, Torri,” says God, “That is exactly what I have been trying to tell you. Let me be your guide through the darkness. Let go of the fear, and trust me”.
I am happy to report that my daughter and I walked through that scary night together and have been walking forward together in a much lighter place ever since.
With 2020 marking a new decade, it will also mark a half-century living in this physical body of mine. That’s right; I will be celebrating the big “five-ohhh” this year. I have made a concentrated effort to move forward through my multitude of fears. Those same fears that have held me back from my dreams my entire life. As I seek to change in life, I once again find myself in a dark, scary place. There is no way of knowing what lies ahead. What surprises are hiding in the dark waiting to jump out?
Through all the fear on an uncertain road of change, my biggest fear… well, my biggest fear is remaining the same. I fear that fear will win again, and in five years, I will be right back where I am now.
Thankfully I have messages of encouragement, and so do you. God has been speaking to us our whole life. Though I know this season of change is uncertain, I know I will not face it alone. I have a hand to hold. I have direct access to the ultimate guide, leading me through the darkness.
Again, is that not what God is saying to us as His precious children. Does He not know you and your capabilities better than you do? I have allowed fear and insecurities throughout life to absolutely paralyze me. Why do I expect my children to chase after their dreams when I have not. I have a great life but am nowhere near fulfilling a long list of accumulated dreams. Why would I not trust what God has been saying to me my whole life?
Out of the countless life lessons I have lectured to my children that God turned to use as instruction for me, the most important message came with no words at all. The most important message God has sent me through being a parent is pure unconditional love.
Because my children are a part of me, they are part of a tiny select group of humans on this earth that get to experience my love agape style. I have continued to love them the same through all of their mistakes, heartaches, and triumphs.
There were times my daughter screamed and yelled at me. Have we not done that with God? There were times when my son was a teenager that I was the last person on earth he wanted to interact with. It was 100% all about girls and his friends. Mom who? Do we not get caught up in our own lives and shut God out just like my teenage son? No matter their behavior, there was absolutely nothing that ever changed my love for them. If we as humans can love in this capacity, how much more does our perfect Father in Heaven love us!
I would like to leave you with a challenge. As you speak to children and/or young adults, pay attention to what advice and instruction you give. What are the encouraging words you’re passing their way? What behaviors of theirs do you silently forgive because they do not know better? Is there anything you are saying to them that is really a divine message for you?
Use this as a beautiful time of mediation to know how much God loves you. Hold his hand and trust in his pure love for you!
Before leaving, I want you to ask yourself a few questions.
If you answered “Yes” to any of these questions, then welcome to my world, my friend! Won’t you please join my beautiful field of Wildflowers where we can grow together!
Send me a message at Wildflowersoul70@gmail.com so that you can be the first to know when I launch my “Wildflower Soul” website!
Additionally, check out my Facebook Page. I look forward to growing with you!
Read more about Wildflower Soul here.
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Namaste
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